Sigh, why are we still dealing with this stupidity? It seems yet another mother has been asked to cover up at yet another restaurant, this time Tim Horton’s. And out come the idiots who are “all for breastfeeding, but please be ‘decent’ about it” or “considerate” or “respectful” or some other bullshit.
And it IS bullshit, people. I am SO freaking tired of this argument because it is SO backwards.
Somebody please explain to me how this is totally okay:
Or any number of Rolling Stone Magazine covers, like this
But when a mother whips out her breast to feed her baby and has the “audacity” not to cover up, that’s indecent?
If our great, great grandmothers were still alive they would probably be wondering what the hell the big deal is, because it was so normal back in the past that nobody even batted an eye.
But now? Society has officially gone insane and any woman who chooses to feed her child in the way nature intended is expected to be discreet about it. I’m sorry, but that’s just ridiculous.
Do we honestly believe that cave mothers worried about covering up so as not to offend the other cave people around her? Do we honestly believe that our great, great, great, great grandmothers ever told each other “cover up before you offend someone”? No. I don’t think they did. Why? Because before the formula companies came into the picture we had mothers nursing their babies and possibly wet-nursing for mothers who were either unable to produce milk or who had died. In the past, breasts were food for babies and toddlers, not playthings for men.
In the past, there was artwork that celebrated breasts for their actual purpose. Like this
And would you look at that? Full nipple exposure. No big deal.
Don’t get me wrong, if a mom wants to cover up then I’m not going to tell her she can’t. That’s her choice to make, after all. But if she doesn’t, well you have two choices. Either avert your eyes and pretend not to notice, or just keep doing what you were doing before and treat the nursing as nothing more out of the ordinary than if a mother pulled out a bottle. Because all she’s doing is feeding her child. And yes, I deliberately said ‘child’ and not ‘baby’. Because nursing toddlers is also not a big deal.
Know what else isn’t a big deal? This
Yes, I’m breastfeeding my son in this picture. Guess what? I’m actually showing far less skin here than I used to in my early twenties. In fact, most of my low cut tops would often expose a little bit less than this, but not a whole lot less.
I posted this photo to Birth Anarchy last week and got a bit of flack for it from my husband. He said it was wrong to do so because there are perverts out there. You know what? I don’t care. That’s not my problem. There are people who get turned on by feet, too. Does that mean I can’t snap a picture of my cute high heels? No, it does not.
Why did I post this photo? Because it’s the first step to normalizing breastfeeding. See, if we keep getting told to cover up, that’s not going to solve anything. That’s not normal, people. Seeing breasts as only sexual is NOT normal. The fact is we NEED to see boobs being used for their actual purpose and we NEED to stop shaming women into covering up.
This is MY body and these are MY boobs, and I’m not ashamed. Actually, I’m pretty damn proud of these boobs, even though they aren’t as perky as they were in my early 20s. But that’s not why I show this picture. I show this picture because this is ME now. This is a sight you are likely to see if you invite me and my son over or come to visit. My son is not going to care what your thoughts are on modesty. All he’s going to care about is nursing when he wants to, and he absolutely will, at some point, climb into my lap and pull down my shirt. He’s very good at pulling my breast out whenever he wants it, and often when I least expect it. So I have one of two choices. I can either be ashamed of my body and hide in a bedroom for the duration of my son’s nursing years (and the nursing years of my next child), or I can be confident and just nurse my son whenever and wherever. I choose option #2 because it’s easier. Besides, there are far sexier pictures of me out there…
But seriously, who cares if someone looks? I’ve got nice boobs; might as well enjoy them while I still got ’em. I’m not going to be young forever, after all ;p